I am Kayak, hear me roar!

I love love Gilmore Girls! Mostly I love Logan Huntzberger...

Dear Mr. Huntzberger,
If only you were real I would ask you to marry me.
Love,
Mrs. Huntzberger wanna be!

What to do next?

I should make this post a poll and have everyone vote on what Kendyl Bell's next step in life should be. I literally skipped out of my very last class of my college career today and ran straight into panic mode! My feeling of pure excitement turned into utter fear as I realized I have no idea what the heck I am gonna do with the rest of my life. I have always lived my life plan by plan, goal by goal, well heck my next goal in life is to buy another coach bag and some grey boots (WOW Ken that is really lofty goal!) Ugh I am so annoying I can't even be excited and proud of myself for ten minutes for finishing something monumental in my life. I immediately have to "pull a Gary," (translation: among the wonderful qualities my dad and I share, I also share his ability to over analyze and stress!) and start making myself even more crazy.

So here is what is running through my mind....some options I have played around with in my mind. Tell me what ya think!

1. Internship in Washington DC
2. Internship at State Capitol (governor's office, lobbyist, etc.)
3. Move to Africa for a few months for a humanitarian project
4. Fashion Design School (apparently SLCC has a year long program; Hey dad I just graduated from college but I want a different degree, what do ya say, can I have a few more grand?)
5. Move to New York to nanny
6. Move to New York and make a living as a live statue of liberty and spend all my money on shoes and shows!!!
7. Go to China to teach English?
8. Mission?? (dad I only said this so you would stop dropping your oh so subtle hints)
9. Start a business (if I told you what I was thinking of starting you would steal my idea)
10. Crawl into a hole and hibernate until someone plans my future for me
11. Pursue a foot modeling career....
12. Become the best ZUMBA instructor out there, move to LA and become Beyonce's fitness extraordinaire
13. Professional french fry tester?
14. Law School?
15. Public Health Master's?
16. Cook my way through the Barefoot Contessa Cookbook?
17. Be the next Bachelorette
18. Be a disney princess, apparently I look Asian so Mulan it is.
19. Tryout for Jazz dancers
20. Purposefully fail all my finals so I don't have to graduate!

People do you see why I don't sleep, I cannot decide what I want to be when I grow up, and I am up! Crap I am gonna lose my mind. Actually I know exactly what I want but I just don't know how to get there. I have always been the type of person to march to the beat of my own drum and choose the path less traveled. I do things the unconventional way but at least I do the things that I can be passionate about. I know I haven't done things they way my parents would have preferred but at least I was able to figure out what I truly wanted and what would ultimately make me happy.

One thing I know more than anything, God has it all figured out even if I don't.

Im 23

I know this is a few days late but I thought I would wish a happy birthday to myself. WOW am I glad 22 is over, it was a draining year. Lots of changes and a variety of emotions. Excitement and disappointment, love and heartbreak, good and bad, intelligent choices and stupid choices, lots of mistakes, many leaps of faith, and lots of Gilmore Girls.

I never want to go through another year like this one but I am grateful for the growth I have experienced and the wonderful people that stepped into my life this year.

I cant sleep

Here goes, I cannot sleep, maybe it is because all I have in me is thousands of mg of Excedrin???? Who knows? Here is what is on my mind...
1. I am really really really really behind in school
2. My stomach is killing me
3. This has been the worst week of my life
4. Boys suck
5. DATING SUCKS WORSE
6. I am sorry but just because I am single doesn't mean I need a man and doesn't mean I have something wrong with me, so there!
7. I suck at dating
8. I am starving because all I have eaten in the past 24 hrs is a disgusting quesadilla from Del Taco (not a good idea, never again will I eat Del Taco.)
9. I have read 3 books today and not one was school related ha, maybe that is why I am so behind in school
10. I had the swine flu and am pretty sure once you are diagnosed it never goes away because I still feel really strange
11. I turn 23 in one month
12. I have more bad dreams then good dreams, how does one fix that?
13. I love Mariah Carey's new song, I wanna know what love is!
14. I hate bajio
15. I am really tired but cannot sleep, how does that work?
16. I graduate from college in like 6 weeks, good heck that is huge and I have no idea what I am supposed to do after. ha ha ha ha ugh its so scary it is funny
17. I bought the most incredible purse on Saturday, a new purse makes all bad things good (well for at least 72 hrs)
18. I really don't want to write any of my papers
19. Can I be done being 22 it was awful
20. It is seriously 15 min to 5 am and I am wired, what is wrong with me
21. Clearly when I am tired and hungry I whine, ha ha ha oops
22. I need a vacation really bad, can't you tell?

I suck at life....well for today at least

Here goes..... I am a senior (super senior, going on 5 years) at BYU. For the record this is my last semester, I graduate in December and will never have to drive to BYU again unless of course I want to. Today was a rather stupid day and I was not thrilled that I had a 45 min commute to Provo. While jamming out to Beyonce driving down University Ave. I got a great idea.....MMMMMM JAMBA!!! I know I am in big trouble because I am not supposed to be eating anything like this, it is pageant prep crunch time. Don't hate me I hate myself enough for cheating already. However I did it anyway, parked my car, walked in side, ordered a Berry Fulfilling with a Fat Burner and Whey Protein Boost (I tried) and then proceed to wait for my off limits treat. In the meantime 4:00 came and passed, "Oh well I can be late to class" I thought to myself. Finally my Jamba was blended, poured in to a cup, and man it tasted soooooo good!

Eventually I walked into class about 15 min late and my friend turns to me and informs me that I had missed a quiz. First I cheat on my diet and then miss a quiz for it, I am the ultimate fat girl. WOW!!!

It gets worse. Bored out of my mind in class I decide to flip through my syllabi's and see what projects and papers I have coming up. I realized I have a paper due this week that I have not purchased the book for. Amazon.com allows me to be so lazy and order books that are inexpensive from the comfort of my own bed. HA! Well, no time for that I would have to, CHECK THE LIBRARY! WHAT IS THAT?!!!!!!!!!!!!! Honestly the only time I ever stepped foot in the library was to use the computer to check facebook, go on a "study date" (the guy had to really hot in order to accompany him on a library date) or one time I went with my roommates (the only reason I stayed was because I had a large McDonald's fry in my purse- so against BYU policy, WHOOPS!)

Anyway, I had to go and look for a book at the library. I looked up the book on the Internet and wrote down the numbers they provided. I had no idea what these little numbers meant so I had to suck it up and ask for help. I approached the information counter where I proceeded to tell the assistant dude that the first number must be the page number. HA, nope it was the call number, the only number that mattered when trying to locate this book. (I really am an idiot) I then had to ask how on earth I was to find this book. Well, he then showed me how to use the library floor plan that shows you where exactly your book is. DUH!!!

Lastly, time to checkout. I had to ask where the check out place was. When the girl got a hold of my student ID and realized I was a senior I am sure she about fell over. Yes I am a super senior and have never ever ever used the library. I felt so stupid!

So, my long stupid day only ended up being longer and making me feel stupider (ha ha jk, more stupid.)

Inspired by my walk to campus

Oh WOW here goes. In my four+ years at BYU I have spent a lot of time observing the unique and rather disturbing fashion trends that exist among the student body. Be for I go any further I must state a disclaimer, I am not trying to be a brat, these are my observations, and they are not specific to any one individual. Now, I just thought I would list for you the many things that make me cring when it comes to the style of the typical BYU student.



1. Shade shirts- Yes they serve a purpose and yes I own a few in white and black; however, if you wear a nude colored shade shirt underneath a top that would be a violation of BYU dress code, YOU CAN STILL SEE THE SHADE SHIRT!!!. Just because it is nude does not make it invisible.

2. Cargo pants- people please stop coming up with different variations of these ugly pants. I am telling you a nice pair of jeans goes a long way. I have seen every version in every color imaginable. It is time to move on...

3. Jeans with a hammer loop- Unless you are majoring in carpentry I simply do not see why this added accessory to a pair of jeans in necessary. I am also not suggesting that cutting it off is a wise idea either.

4. Teva's- According to TLC's what not to wear Stacy and Clinton would say (I PROMISE), just because it is compfortable does not mean you should wear it. Especially if they are worn with socks. Gross

5. Long socks- if you are wearing tall socks with you shorts, it is to cold to be wearing shorts. PERIOD!

6. Free T-shirts- you know they kind most guys are super stoked they caught at the most recent sporting event. Really wear them on a Saturday or give them to your dad and brother's for Chritmas, we all know it was free and it makes me uncomfortable.

7. Leggings- Oh how I love a great pair of leggings when the shirt I am wearing covers my bum, if your bum is showing change into jeans or buy longer tops.

8. Long ankle length sister missionary skirts- girls this one is for you, trust me no guy likes em. If you want a date for Saturday don't wear them! You are allowed to sleep in them or wear them to church with your family when you go home to visit. Seriously for the record do not wear them in front of anyone!

9. BYU gear- obviously I see you on campus is it really necessary to shout to everyone, I GO TO BYU, save it for Saturday's football game.

10. Ties in class- I understand if you are coming to school from work but leave your tie in the car. It is a huge turn off trust me ha ha ha

I am sure there are more but I cannot think of them right now, I will do a follow up blog I am sure when I leave campus I will think of something else.

So Many Blog Ideas so Little Time.

Good grief, I have like three blogs in my head and I just don't have the time to sit and write them out. For now, I just want the world to know that I miss my little sister Andrea already. She moved to New York to pursue her dream of becoming a professional ballerina. I love her so much. She is my inspiration and hero. She is living proof that your dreams can come true if you are willing to work hard enough. Here dedication is unbelievable and her eye for detail and perfection is remarkable. She will be a principle with New York City Ballet soon enough, mark my words.